Skip to product information
Black / S funny T-Shirt that says If my mouth doesn’t say it, my face will. | Deadpan Edition Tee by Sweary Brand

If My Mouth Doesn’t Say It, My Face Will | Funny Sarcastic T-Shirt | Sweary Brand Deadpan Edition

Regular Price  $38.00 Sale Price  $30.40
Color
Size

🔒 Secure checkout
📦 Free U.S. shipping
on all orders
⏰ Ships out in 1-3 business days
🇺🇸 Designed & printed to order in the USA

We're a small family-owned & smartass-operated biz in the Midwest. Our designs start from funny conversations, profanity-filled rants, and shit that happens in real life. IYKYK.

Product Details

This funny sarcastic t-shirt says what your expression already does. “If My Mouth Doesn’t Say It, My Face Will” is printed in gray on soft black cotton for those with zero poker face and zero regrets.

It’s the perfect funny graphic tee for meetings, family gatherings, and small talk with strangers. Comfortable, breathable, and blissfully blunt — a wearable mood.

  • Unisex cotton blend for resting-face representation
  • Tag-free neck because microexpressions shouldn’t itch
  • Fade-resistant print that keeps attitude intact

This adult humor shirt is ideal for introverts, truth-tellers, and anyone whose eyebrows speak fluent sarcasm.

Return Policy

Our goal is for every customer to be totally happy with their purchase! If this isn't the case, let us know within 30 days of receiving your order and we'll work with you to make it right.

Payment Methods
  • American Express
  • Apple Pay
  • Diners Club
  • Discover
  • Google Pay
  • Mastercard
  • PayPal
  • Shop Pay
  • Visa

Shit You Should Know...

Fit + Fabric

Our tees are: unisex, fashion-fit (not boxy), TAGLESS, super soft, lightweight, and built for repeat wear. Ringspun cotton, y'all! Guys and gals love 'em!

Wash Instructions

Wash your shirt before wearing it the first time! Turn it inside out. Wash with cold water. Tumble dry low or air dry. Enjoy!

Print Method + Color

Our designs are printed into the fabric (not layered on top), so they're breathable. Colors may vary slightly IRL — screens are liars.

Questions, anyone? Anyone?

These are unisex tees, so they fit like your favorite go-to shirt. Size up for a looser fit, size down if you like it clingy. Be sure to check the size chart!

Uhh...nope! Thankfully, our tees are pre-shrunk and made from super soft & durable 100% cotton, so they’ll keep their shape. Please wash yours before wearing the first time! Wash inside out on cold, dry on low or hang to dry.

Short answer: Soon. Slightly longer answer: It depends. All of our items are printed-to-order, and we partner with a few U.S.-based print partners. So depending on what you ordered, items may ship separately. Most orders are processed within 1–3 business days, then shipped out with tracking. You’ll get email updates every step of the way!

If something arrives damaged, defective, or misprinted, we’ll fix it fast. Just send an email with photos to support@swearybrand.com within *30 days* of receiving your order and we'll work with you to make it right. We offer customized solutions based on your situation (refund, exchange, shop credit, or discount on a reorder).

More Funny T-Shirts with Sayings

Find Your Funny: Shop Our Humor Editions